We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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