belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
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