tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
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I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
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I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
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