I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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