the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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