And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
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