Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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