You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
