its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
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I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
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just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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