please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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