I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize