god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize