He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
