Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
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