the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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