So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
now i know why i became what i already was.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Randomize
