ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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