I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
