wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..