i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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