I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.