Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
