You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Randomize