haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
