I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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