no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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