It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Drunk walkin through police station. America
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize
