I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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