Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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