Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
