You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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