I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
So vagazzling was a success
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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