Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
two words: eviction party
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
