My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
