i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm gonna fight the coyote
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
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