Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
