their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
