we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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