peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I think a kid would responsible me up
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize