i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
