so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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