she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
