I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
