DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Randomize
