About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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