A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
What a dumb baby whore.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
