Texts From Last Night

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  (419): View more from Ohio

  I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.

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  (419): I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl. http://tfl.nu/cxal
  Replies (23) Good night (1716) Bad night (1346)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.

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  (678): Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans. http://tfl.nu/jpyk
  Replies (32) Good night (8736) Bad night (1066)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!

  (1-310): View more from California

  you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?

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  (310): thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee! (1-310): you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right? http://tfl.nu/vyk6
  Replies (30) Good night (12045) Bad night (1438)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.

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  (845): I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties. http://tfl.nu/q6j5
  Replies (5) Good night (2844) Bad night (1132)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.

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  (443): we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out. http://tfl.nu/gq5i
  Replies (9) Good night (2573) Bad night (879)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.

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  (330): It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this. http://tfl.nu/6tb8
  Replies (4) Good night (541) Bad night (1245)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.

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  (724): dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another. http://tfl.nu/986r
  Replies (7) Good night (567) Bad night (1764)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.

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  (847): He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris. http://tfl.nu/t2sy
  Replies (5) Good night (1144) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.

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  (901): I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy. http://tfl.nu/blaa
  Replies (2) Good night (793) Bad night (356)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday

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  (706): We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday http://tfl.nu/wcd8
  Replies (2) Good night (896) Bad night (417)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex

  (563): View more from Iowa

  Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.

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  (605): I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex (563): Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers. http://tfl.nu/hepc
  Replies (2) Good night (956) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.

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  (443): I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste. http://tfl.nu/1x8j
  Replies (6) Good night (816) Bad night (453)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree

  (1-719): View more from Colorado

  it happenes

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  (719): I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree (1-719): it happenes http://tfl.nu/m4ky
  Replies (1) Good night (977) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  "Only you can prevent yeast infections."

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  (609): Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list (856): "Only you can prevent yeast infections." http://tfl.nu/zmgo
  Replies (4) Good night (699) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought

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  (406): 1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought http://tfl.nu/94t9
  Replies (2) Good night (315) Bad night (251)

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