Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?