guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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