This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
