TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize