By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
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Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
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Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Your penis caused this!
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize