I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
